The Best of Men

I know this post is a day late, if I were going by the calendar's date set aside for the applause for the world's much needed good fathers. As I told Joe yesterday, my arms wrapped around him, "I hope your day wasn't spectacular. That is, I hope if was just a tad better than other days. I want you to know you are special and appreciated by this family all the time, not just today."

So, I am supposing that it is therefore appropriate that I give a tribute to Joe, the father of my children, one day after the official father's day. Every day Joe. We love and appreciate you every day.

There is a relationship between daughters and good fathers that seems to be unmatched. Any person who has had more than a five minute conversation with me would know that I am a self-proclaimed, "daddy's-girl." I love my Papa more than I am sure he is aware, and it is so hard on me to live so far from his arms. He was the kind of father who would give you the last crinkled dollar out of his wallet if you needed it (he would slowly and painfully draw the last of his money out of his wallet and hand it over, never missing an opportunity to inflict guilt on the receiver). I would accept it, and spend it a little wiser. His famous quote if asked a favor of him was always, "it will cost you a dollar--or a hug and kiss." He couldn't go to sleep unless he knew all his babies were inside and he was the one to lock them all in safe for the night. He is a just man. I have never seen my dad be dishonest in anything he did, and he was always fair. At Christmas if my dad spent a little more for on one child than he did on another, then one can expect to see a little extra money in their stocking to make up the difference. My dad has arms like Popeye. Big and strong-minus the anchor tattoo. He could lift or fix anything, and instilled in me the same crazy work ethic coupled with mantra that, "if I can't do it, it is probably impossible." There is a poem that reminds me of him:

Only a dad with a tired face, Coming home from the daily race, Toiling and striving from day to day, Facing whatever may come his way, Glad in his heart that his own rejoice To see him come home and to hear his voice.
Only a dad, but he gives his all, Smoothing the way for his children small, Doing with courage so stern and grim The deeds that his father did for him. These are the lines that for him I pen, Only a dad—but the best of men.

There was a tall order to fill when it came to finding a father for my own unborn children.

I thought I knew what I wanted in a eternal companion and father of my children; and when I met Joe, I was certain that Joe was him. Having been married almost five years and having two kids, I can say that he has far surpassed anything my limited understanding could have dreamed up as what I would need in my life and as the father figure and in that roll the director of my children's lives. To quote Jeffry R Holland of the 12 apostles:

"Our homes are to be more than sanctuaries; they should also be places where God’s Spirit can dwell, where the storm stops at the door, where love reigns and peace dwells."

Joe has made our home that sanctuary. Having a man who holds the priesthood, who blesses and prays to God for the welfare and safety of his family is a wonderful and sacred thing to me. To add another dimension, having a man who will pray for his family, and still have the faith necessary to accept the will of the Lord when the answers are not what we thought we needed, is more comforting still.

One new father wrote: “Often as I watch my son watch me, I am taken back to moments with my own dad, remembering how vividly I wanted to be just like him. I remember having a plastic razor and my own can of foaming cream, and each morning I would shave when he shaved. I remember following his footsteps back and forth across the grass as he mowed the lawn in summer.
“Now I want my son to follow my lead, and yet it terrifies me to know he probably will. Holding this little boy in my arms, I feel a ‘heavenly homesickness,’ a longing to love the way God loves, to comfort the way He comforts, to protect the way He protects. The answer to all the fears of my youth was always ‘What would Dad do?’ Now that I have a child to raise I am counting on a Heavenly Father to tell me exactly that.”

I know that feeling lives inside each parent, and it is strong in Joe. I have every confidence in him, that he will rise to the occasion and rear children that will fill us with pride and joy in our old age, because he has a close relationship with his Savior and Heavenly Father and seeks their guidance as he lights the path and leads his family down the road of life as our Patriarch.

I am surrounded by the best of men. And I know in time as Sadie searches for her eternal companion after loving and being loved by a man such as Joe the next will have big shoes to fill.